An Open Letter to Female Celebrities

To Whom It May Concern,

Over the past several weeks, we, the public, have been inundated with beaver shots. While I can't speak for everyone, I for one am not all that interested in seeing vagine. Surely you have enough money for panties.

And why are you not wearing panties anyway? I understand that some women do not wear underwear, but they surely are not wearing micro-minis and climbing out of cars.



While we're on the subject, what is up with being completely shaven? Is the landing strip a thing of the past? (On an aside, do normal grown humans really find child-like vaginas hot?) Not that I'm real 70's, and definitely not young Demi Moore-ish but...I don't know. A bald adult "area" is weird.

Let's take back our snatches, ladies, and save the wide-open shots for our partners and our OBGYNs.

Peace,
sbh

P.S. When are we going to see some bits and pieces? I would like to see what Clive Owen is packing, but that's just me...

Now Hear This: Billie Jean - Chris Cornell

I was way into the grunge scene in the 90s. Doc Martens, flannel shirts & jeans, and flowered dresses were the main stays of my wardrobe. I longed to go to Seattle and live like a character from the movie Singles, sipping coffee and pontificating with my long-haired boyfriend about nothing in particular but everything in general.

And the music. It was just...fantastic. Mud Honey. Mother Love Bone. Jane's Addiction. Soundgarden. Alice in Chains. Hole. Nirvana. And of course, Pearl Jam. I loved them all!

While I am much more corporate these days (unfortunately), I still enjoy these groups and do follow their music of today. Well, the ones who are still together, which is only Pearl Jam and Mudhoney, I think. I do follow some of the new bands that have come out of the members of these old bands, but they just ain't the same for the most part.

SO...I was VERY excited to stumble onto stereogum and find this remake of Michael Jackson's hit, "Billie Jean" performed by none other than mysterious hottie Chris Cornell foremerly of Soundgarden, currently of Audioslave, made up of the guys who used to be in Rage Against the Machine, minus Zach de la Rocha.



As most Americans, I was also a Michael Jackson fan in the 80's. But I didn't wear red leather and a beaded glove. I swear. Although I do admit to having a few t-shirts. One of my favorites was yellow and had the cover of Thriller on it.

Oh, wait.

That might've been my E.T. shirt. Same diff, really. Anyhoo, this remake is quite dark and just awesome. Enjoy!


Chris Cornell - Billie Jean


And don't tell me this shit isn't awesome, too.

Now See This: Spiderman 3 Trailer

I am a super hero movie junkie and I'm squealing with delight over this trailer! This movie looks HAWT, as does Topher Grace.




And I'm so glad Willie Ames got a chance at a comeback as Sandman.

Please remember to vote today!

No matter what your party, please get out and vote today! (Although, I do encourage you to vote Democrat!)

Now Hear This: Sarah McLachlan - River

Is it too early to start talking about Christmas? When I heard "Baby It's Cold Oustide" while on hold for someone this morning, I was shocked! So anyway, that kind of put me in the Christmas spirit.

In her new Christmas album, Winter Song, Sarah McLachlan pays homage to fellow Canadian Joni Mitchell with this cover of Joni's classic, "River". Sarah and I got very close during college, and hearing this song made me remember why I was so into her back then. I must bust out Fumbling Towards Ecstasy soon.

Anyway, get yourself in the (early) Spirit of the Season and download "River" today!

Sarah McLachlan - River

Post-Halloween: Candy Hangover

Unfortunately, work obligations prevented me from posting the FANTABULOUS Halloween post I had planned for yesterday, but I was still able to have a SPOOKY evening! Hope you all had fun.